My "Mothers Day" RANT - Allotments - Have a Laugh - Forum

Just got a call. Well, they left a message. Not word for word but you get the drift:

"Hi, I got an allotment. I need someone to get rid of the weeds. And to give it a nice layout. To dig it over and plant vegetables.
Payment would be in barter arrangement. You can get some of the fruits of labour."

Now, if it were April fools day I would say one of my friends is pulling a fast one on me.

But no this is for REAL!!!!

I tried to apply for years to get an allotment. All in my area have waiting lists going back up to 5 years. I be dead by the time I may get one offered. However, driving past these "allotments" I see them untended, used as a rubbish tip, looking very unkempt and quite disgusting. In fact so much so, that I lost interest and installed my own high beds in my garden. So much more convenient, but had to give up some not much missed lawn space.

Yeah, right! Are these people for real? An allotment means you have to put the effort in YOURSELF. That's the whole point. And not to offer real hard cash in payment is really chancing it. No Thanks. Find some other fool.

Deleted voicemail in disgust.

Stepping off my soapbox now and feeling somewhat better.

Replies

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Harry@VWGS March 6, 2016 at 11:47am

Shouldn't laugh, but that is amusing ....;-) we have the same here, waiting lists through the roof but allotment areas look like tips with no care at all, I don't think some people realise what work it takes to get good crops, and the novelty of growing wears off, however they also know how hard it is to get an allotment space so are reluctant to give it up....
Colin Hunt March 6, 2016 at 1:49pm

Thanks for making me chuckle! I have 100's of work related stories picked up through the years - I like this one for it's cheek!
Russ Francis March 6, 2016 at 3:31pm

Lol you have to wonder what thinking goes on in people's minds (or how little as the case may be), there are some really deranged people out there. The joys of the general public !

Our allotments are in pretty good shape, but the comittee are very hot on plots that are left untended. You get a couple of warning letters then you lose it.
Andrew Midgley March 6, 2016 at 7:43pm

One of my pet hates is when prospective customers get in touch saying that they would love to have a vegetable garden. I usually asked them if they have summer holidays and yes we have a fortnight here and a weekend there and we are so busy with the kids that my hubby barely get the time to mow the grass let alone do any DIY around the house etc. You get the gist! So I usually say have a think about it because there's a lot of work goes to working a vegetable plot. Easier and cheaper to get the vegs from a supermarket.
Billybop March 7, 2016 at 11:07am

yes they probably don't quite understand the work and commitment involved..I have 2 allotment plots myself and have done one-off jobs for other plot holders like strimming spraying and rotavating...but for hard cash not the promise of a few brussel sprouts..this is also in my interest as neglected plots would spread weeds onto mine.. there maybe people desperate to grow vegetables who would consider such an arrangement, but not a professional gardener obviously
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Robbie March 7, 2016 at 12:43pm

Classic