It's not the dog, it's the owner....

The mistress of my favourite canine emailed me yesterday.... along with some work stuff, she also mentioned that she'd been enjoying my blogs recently.... she's remaining nameless in this blog post, because I want to do a little hymn of praise to the fabulous bubble of joy that is Newton the black labrador to balance out the rant I'm going to have a bit further on....So.... Newton.... Ahhhh, Newton..... he is everything a dog should be and more.... he wags not just his tail, but his entire back end to really emphasise just how overjoyed he is to see you .... Newton's greetings are like an oscillating black furry Chanel logo on fast forward.... beautiful big brown soulful eyes of a poet.... inside the doggie brain, he's certainly composing simple, perfect Haiku (mostly about squirrels, sticks, swimming and the park.... but read between the lines, there's the fundamental music of the universe twined into his fido verse.... it's a whole new Zen).... while you are in his realm, you are the sole object of his affection (as is everyone else who happens to be in the house.... he could teach Peter Mandelson a thing or two).... five minutes with Newton is better for your soul than chicken soup, hot bubble baths and aromatherapy candles everyday for a week.... He is, with no question, the World's Best Dog.....So.... from one extreme to the other....It saddened me to hear recently that not only are children and pets falling victim to so-called 'weapon dogs', but so are the nation's trees..... Apparently, to keep your weapon dog at peak performance, so it can really savage properly and not just do an average job, it's de rigeur to have it hang from a tree to strengthen its jaws.... hence bark damage followed by tree demise..... I thought this sounded a bit bonkers, so I did some 'research' and find there is some evidence.... See the Trees for Cities campaign 'Bark for Bark' on this link: Bark for Bark.What kind of person gets entertainment from hanging a dog from a tree in a park on a Saturday afternoon?... It just can't be that interesting a thing to watch.... What's wrong with television? Or video games? Or drinking and gambling, for that matter? And surely it has to be painful for or potentially damaging to the dog?.... Can you just imagine what Christmas is like in the house of someone who gets their dog to hang from a tree... 'Chihuahuas near the top on the smaller branches, please, Elizabeth.... James, if you could hang the mid-size terriers towards the middle..... oops, the lights have shorted again.... someone needs walkies.....'I just despair........ thank heaven for Newton..... if only he could telepathically communicate to all his doggie brethren: 'Jaws relax, branch free..... Run, roll, play, shake, wag.... A biscuit, good boy'
Votes: 0
E-mail me when people leave their comments –

You need to be a member of Landscape Juice Network to add comments!

Join Landscape Juice Network

Open forum activity

JANINE MCMAHON replied to Oliver clarkson's discussion Rose spray
"Look forward to hearing your results.
 "
13 hours ago
John F replied to Richard Farley's discussion Nature Loving Customers !!!
"It's interesting though how many customers see any creature within their garden territory as an intruder . 
Fear of the unknown perhaps ? 
Must admit though the unfortunate  label of slow worm does them no favours . "
22 hours ago
Billybop replied to Richard Farley's discussion Nature Loving Customers !!!
"to be fair, if they were unaware of what Slow Worms are, from the name alone, they might sound like a pest, like some outdoor type of tape worm"
yesterday
Honey Badger replied to Richard Farley's discussion Nature Loving Customers !!!
"By breaking the laws on protected species."
yesterday
Dan Fish is now a member of Landscape Juice Network
yesterday
Richard Farley posted a discussion
Had a brief chat with a once a year customer , where I just cut his knee length grass down . I happened to mention the abundance of wildlife in his garden , and that last year I saw some slow worms basking in the sun.He looked at me and replied " Oh…
yesterday
David Benson replied to Henry's discussion Etesia Hydro 80 failing to start
"no expert on this but the safty switch on the seat will not allow any power to the starter unless you are sat on it or bypast. Ihave come accross other switches on the deck if ther is a removable flap 
is the earth on the starter ok "
Monday
David Benson replied to Peter sellers's discussion Compost survey
"i have used clover multi purpos which has some peat in it no lumps or rubbish in it. 3 bags today for potting and seeds did not come accross anything i had to chuck out "
Monday
Neil brown posted a discussion
Hi Everyone Does anybody use project completion forms for customer's to sign at completion to say they are satisfied with the outcome to avoid payment issues when sending the final invoice Thanks in Advance Neil 
Monday
Billybop replied to Brian's Garden Maintenance's discussion Clients contracts for wet Grass cutting
"hi Brian, the charge would essentially be doubled. Tripled even. Or something close to that. Depending on when I would be available to return. Especially on the big gardens which are not easy to reschedule. So there is no incentive for the customer…"
Monday
Brian's Garden Maintenance replied to Brian's Garden Maintenance's discussion Clients contracts for wet Grass cutting
"Thank you, Adam, for your replay
That is a great help. if you don't mind me asking. How much would you charge for the nock back what sort of a percentage do add on extra for the second visit, please?
 "
Monday
Brian's Garden Maintenance replied to Brian's Garden Maintenance's discussion Clients contracts for wet Grass cutting
"Adam One of my clients I do need water wings on the lawnmower it is that wet! LOL Luck I got a 4 wheel lawnmower!
 "
Monday
Brian's Garden Maintenance replied to Brian's Garden Maintenance's discussion Clients contracts for wet Grass cutting
"Thank you, Billybop for your reply.
Yes, there are domestic types! If you don't mind me asking. How much percentage do you charge extra for the second visit, please?
 "
Monday
Andrew replied to Peter sellers's discussion Compost survey
"I agree that the quality of compost, PARTICULARLY peat-free p.compost is appalling.I find sticks,bits of plastic/stones,string etc in these 'environmentally' friendly brands.Basically, we're in wild west country now where any old tom,dick and harry…"
Monday
Henry replied to Henry's discussion Etesia Hydro 80 failing to start
"I did wonder that but it's not getting 12v at all on the trigger wire, so I don't think it's being "asked" to energise "
Monday
Henry replied to Henry's discussion Etesia Hydro 80 failing to start
"That's really helpful, although I haven't replaced my loom it does sound like a very similar issue and gives me a few things to try "
Monday
More…

Nature Loving Customers !!!

Had a brief chat with a once a year customer , where I just cut his knee length grass down . I happened to mention the abundance of wildlife in his garden , and that last year I saw some slow worms basking in the sun.He looked at me and replied " Oh…

Read more…
3 Replies · Reply by John F 22 hours ago
Views: 125